Tag Archives: aloneness

The Desert

The edges of his shoes were scuffed and nicked, and a layer of dust clung to them. The sound of a pebble as he scrunched it underfoot made him look down and notice, each step stirring up a small cloud of dust as his feet met the ground, one after the other. It was a dirt road, and he had been on it a long time.

He looked up from his feet and his gaze returned to the horizon, where the road ahead disappeared over the edge where the clouds met the now graying sky. Against the fading light of the day, there were a few trees dark and lonely seemingly scattered at random, breaking the long line of sight that extended ahead to the right and left, endlessly.

His legs were tired from the day’s journey, and his back throbbed slightly from the weight of his pack. Not too exhausted to walk another few hours, but then it would be dark, and harder to find a suitable place to make camp. Better to stop now, and start again before dawn tomorrow.

To his right, past the edge of the road, an endless expanse of flat land. On the left the terrain was pretty much the same, but he could see a few slight rises here and there, the beginning of hills that slowly gave way, in the far distance, to a range of low lying mountains. About a hundred yards off the road in that direction was a large outcropping of rocks that seemed like the head of a giant statue buried neck-deep in the spare and sandy soil. What might have been a nose hung out about halfway up the formation, giving a bit of protection from the sun In its shadow. If it rains tonight, he thought, that might be the driest place for miles.

As he picked his way carefully across the stretch of unpaved earth towards the rocks, he casually gathered what twigs and dry grass he could carry. Standing under the jutting rock overhang, he glanced back at the road, then lay down his bundle of sticks and weeds. Then he circled the rock formation, which was about 30 feet across, three times – looking for signs of animal or insect life, anything that might indicate other users of this spot. Seeing no evidence of recent activity, he returned to his stockpiled fuel, kicked a small circle of earth away to form a hollow in the ground, and filled it with the dry twigs.

04 AUG 2003

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Finding the Ocean (Again)

I have looked for long hours across the bay,
sensing in the coming dawn some great sign;
after my simple chores are done each day,
when each minute spent does not seem so fine,

along the windswept shore I roam, my eyes
scanning the horizon for floating birds,
seeing the joining of the earth and skies
and in that union, peace beyond words.

Today, there in the mist I thought I spied
upon a raft, a man who looked like me;
our glances locked, and with my hand I tried

to steer his way across the stretching sea.
He waved, and in the wind his hair was wild;
I waited on the rocky shore, and smiled.

11 JUL 2003

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Exposure

In reality, we all stand naked
and alone on the dark edge of a cliff;
if sometimes, fearlessness cannot be faked,
that is not shameful. It is not as if

we are the only fools who shiver
when faced with the specter of some unseen
fate, or hesitate at a great river
not knowing just what lies waiting downstream.

Any time you cut beneath the surface,
there will be a wound, and you will draw blood
(and some will flinch and turn their faces from you,
not understanding the surgeon’s purpose,
nor seeing their own cold flesh caked with mud);
those with their own pale scars will see you through.

06 FEB 2003

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