How many heartfelt vows
have crossed my lips now,
broken
by wrongs I allow
and the petty rows
spoken
with swords forged from plows,
seeking sacred cow’s
tokens
in the dark days since
the first subtle hints
were seen
of truth, that glints
beneath a thin chintz
(the means
of experience)
and gives evidence
in dreams?
30 MAR 2004
Posted in Poems
Tagged daily poems, honesty, insight, lai, poetic forms, truth, vows
An interview meme, in which I am asked five questions by LJ user saturnalia22:
1: Is there any particular song (or songs) that you feel is (are) so amazing that you wish to kill or severely maim anyone who interrupts you while you’re listening to it (them)? If so, what? If not, what song(s) come closest to this sentiment?
Strange, but this and many of the other questions I would have answered so differently just five years ago. Not that even then I would consider killing or severely maiming, but definitely getting hot under the collar and irate … usually it’s the long songs that one gets into the mood of … like Ravi Shankar’s performance at the Monterey Pop Festival, or Pink Floyd’s “Echoes” … those would come close. When you have kids, though, you get so used to being interrupted in the middle of anything that if that were to cause thoughts of murder, there wouldn’t be any future generations. A whole song? LOL…you must be joking.
2: Tom Waits once said, “Don’t you know there ain’t no devil, that’s just god when he’s drunk.” What do you feel is god’s (or fate’s, or fortune’s or mother nature’s or whatever your belief may be) most cruel or creative (your choice) joke played on the world? What about the most cruel/creative joke played on mankind?
Ah, Tom Waits – so gifted and yet so bitter. I think it is possible that Tom Waits has a Bukowski complex, if there is such a thing. But at least the question is straight-forward. I think the cruelest (and also most creative) joke played on the world was the introduction of the human species. By whatever means it was accomplished. I think the most cruel/creative joke played on mankind was the ability to use intellect and compassion separately. That possibility for the separation of church and state has resulted in both evil genius and ineffective sentimentalists.
3: Define “reality” in your own terms.
The world as it is. Not as it should be, or was, or will be. Traveling at the speed of now. Energy borrowed, energy returned. Not what you see, because there are so many words in language that relate to the lies of the eyes. What you hear the world to be. The song you have to learn, or be mute.
4: Name the character in a book, poem, song, or movie that you would most like to be. What about the one you’d least like to be?
Strange question, in a way. The problem with choosing a character from a work of Fiction is you already know how their life is going to end. You’d have to give up that mystery to switch with them. Don’t know if I’ve ever really considered that a worthwhile proposition. But, when I was a kid, I wanted to be Remo Williams in the series the Destroyer. Because, frankly, I thought it would great to have an ancient oriental guru. LOL. But I think it is probably closer to my reality now that I would choose Siddhartha or Magister Ludi (both from Herman Hesse). I guess I’d least like to be Mr. Potter (the banker from “It’s a Wonderful Life”).
5: If were offered the ability to, just by thinking it, cause anyone you wish to die instantly, would you accept it? If so, who would be on your shit list? If not, why not?
Of course, that’s assuming that we each don’t have the ability already … No. I would not accept it, nor if I had it, would I use it. The responsibility is too great, and life is too precious. I am not in a position to judge ANYONE. Besides, people that get on my “shit list” eventually clean up – after all, it IS water soluble. There are a lot of people that I have a great deal of compassion for … and worry about … and wish would get their lives together … and recognize their own potential (whatever that may be, not up to me to say) … but nobody’s been on my shit-list for probably 10 years.
For those who REALLY want to know some history …
Thirty years ago, I just entered the second grade, my first year in a population 7,500 town in rural northwest Ohio after having been through first grade in Ferndale, Michigan. We moved to the country 1) because they were going to start bussing kids to the inner city schools of Detroit, 2) my parents wanted to get out of the city in general, 3) my dad’s father (my grandfather) was getting sicker (emphysema) and my grandmother needed help with her farm (about 40 minutes away from ours), 4) my mom’s father (also my grandfather) was retiring from the police force after 25 years as Greenhills, OH police chief and also was not doing well health-wise, and 5) my sister was just born. Later that year, both grandpas would die, and I would write my first song.
Twenty years ago, I graduated from high school (West Torrance, California), with no plans, few friends, and two weeks to kill before my dad put me to work at his company. Of course, it was for me only a temporary gig, until I was discovered as a rock and roll star. I’m still working in technology, 20 years later … LOL.
Ten years ago, my father died, exactly one summer (three months) after he retired at age 65. It may be of interest to note that “it was the third of September / a day I’ll always remember, yes I will / ’cause that was the day / my daddy died” (“Papa Was a Rolling Stone,” the Temptations). It might be also interesting to note that I heard the news from my younger brother (who was obviously dealing with the situation on a somewhat out-of-it basis), who called to let me know (exact words) “I’m calling to let you know that my father has died.” This occurred about twenty three minutes after I had just taken two hits of acid in Memphis in the same room with someone who was a Klan member who had in his past committed manslaughter against a minority race individual in a dispute over crack, and also someone who was wanted in three states for a former occupation (cooking meth for the Hell’s Angels in Texas). Needless to say, I spent the remainder of the evening engrossed in Ram Dass’ “Be Here Now” – or I probably wouldn’t be here now.
Five years ago, I was ending a four-year marriage to someone who, to put it bluntly, was absolutely incompatible with me, and I had moved back to rural Ohio to the family farm after living in Seattle. Can someone say I have a prediliction for culture shock? I also attended my would-be (if I had stayed in Ohio) high school’s fifteen year reunion, and ended up in the emergency room being rehydrated and my stomach pumped after having passed out and having to be ambulanced from said reunion.
One year ago, I was again avoiding Jazzfest here in New Orleans, enjoying the pre-summer weather with Starlight Dances.
One month ago, I was filling out my tax returns, contemplating home improvements, and inexplicably enjoying a Slim Fast shake.
One week ago, I was spending my tax refund on a plethora of home improvement items – new shutters, shower curtain, new mattress and boxspring (our old one was 15 years old), sheets, blankets … oh, yeah 🙂 … new books, a new transverse bamboo flute, statue of Kali (om kring kalikaye namah om) …
Yesterday, I worked. And then helped with dinner for the Troll Queen and a friend. And then trucked them across the river so they could see the premiere of X2. And purchased new mini-blinds for the front windows. And loved Starlight Dances without question or pause, as usual.
Today, I responded to this meme, put up the mini-blinds, did the dishes, listened to the Beatles, counted my japa beads (om namah shivaya), and contemplated the wonder that has been my life.
